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31 October 2007 @ 10:58 pm
 
i haven't updated in a million years.

i'm in urinetown the musical right now.
i'm bobby strong
 we open in 9 days...

my life is so consumed by everything i'm doing, and i love everything that i'm doing, but it's all very overwhelming.  urinetown, that goes without saying, is taking over my life, but that will be over in less than two weeks.  thereafter i really have to practice like 8 hours a day for grad school auditions which will be coming up in the february and march.  i'm taking way too many classes, and that stresses me out even more.  all that, and i'm in a relationship that i have no time for, so my feelings for him (which are positive, i really like him) are negated by the fact that i have no time or energy to devote to him.  i have no right to be in a relationship right now.  i don't even have 5 minutes for myself, no less somebody else.  and the thing is, if i get 5 minutes, i want to spend it on myself.  and that might be selfish, but like, stuff gets to a point where if i don't have 'me' time i'm going to crazy and it's getting very very very close to that point right about now.

oh, so, grad school.... i'm never going to get in..
 
 
 
Bethtibicensilvae on November 2nd, 2007 07:16 pm (UTC)
Good luck on everything that's eating up your time, especially the grad school auditions. Where are you applying?
Zachinherentharmony on November 2nd, 2007 08:24 pm (UTC)
that is part of the problem.. i'm not entirely sure of the list yet.. but the definites are: peabody (piccolo master's program!!), cleveland institute, boston conservatory, north texas, possibly illinois urbana-champaign, and then a whole bunch of possibilities that i still need to thoroughly look into (like, yesterday!!)
Bethtibicensilvae on November 3rd, 2007 06:00 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I see why that would stress you out. I remember having huge spreadsheets for every program I applied to (there were 9!) with due dates and what each required, since it's different at every school. Ugh. If you decide to apply Indiana University and need a place to crash while you're doing your auditions, just let me know!
fluteobsessedmfluteobsessedm on November 4th, 2007 03:30 am (UTC)
Shut it. You're going to be great.
You'll work it all out
and kudos to you for spending 10 minutes to write that paragraph to tell us all how you're doing :)